For this inaugural column on remarriage in Boomer Living+, I thought a great place to start would be to cover the simple five Ws, i.e. the what, who, why, when, and where. And, by the way, the “why” covers the “what problem are you trying to solve?” question which I was just asked yesterday, and one I am asked, especially by people who haven’t ever gotten remarried or experienced living in a blended or stepfamily. Whether you are remarried or not, remarriage and stepfamily living is something that should matter to you, and I’ll be sure to share why in this column.

So, what is remarriage? In these times, this question itself undoubtedly could fill an entire column. Let’s simply say it is the state, condition, or relationship of being married again. It doesn’t just apply to people who are getting married to the same person twice, which I have heard about more than a few times. And, it isn’t about renewing vows with the same spouse whom you married the first time. And, it often means living in a stepfamily.

Approximately, 65% of remarriages include children. And, nearly 1/3 of the U.S. population is either considering remarriage after being divorced or widowed, or is already remarried. One million remarriages take place annually. Nearly everyone knows someone in a stepfamily.

You can easily see my bio on Boomer Living+; I won’t bore you other than to say I have been studying, researching, living in, sleeping, eating, and breathing the topic of remarriage for nearly nine years. I, myself am just a couple of years shy of being an actual baby boomer, but I am remarried to a baby boomer by definition, and we have five children, ages 14 to 26 between us.

My mission is to enable successful remarriages and stepfamilies and to help provide solutions for people, baby boomers included, that are anywhere on the remarriage journey — whether they are considering remarriage after divorce or widowhood, planning a second (or subsequent) wedding, or experiencing stepfamily life.

Not being a baby boomer myself, it has been really important to me that I learn about YOU. According to David Weigelt and Jonathan Boehman in Dot Boom, a core value of baby boomers is relationship values. They say “relationship values shift as a person moves into the second half of their life.” According to Weigelt and Boehman, “…younger people value relationships for what they can gain from them, whether it be finding a romantic partner or scoring a promotion…” and that “older adults are generally more concerned with what they put into a relationship than what they can get out of it.” Additionally, “they seek comfort and pleasure in stable relationships in which they can both give and receive.”

The needs of remarried couples and stepfamilies are truly unique. They face challenges that couples marrying for the first time do not, and their family dynamics are often very difficult. That’s clear from the divorce rate of second marriages, which is between 60-70%. It’s even higher than the divorce rate of 50% for first marriages.

Whether you are on the remarriage journey yourself and want a pleasurable stable relationship, or have loved ones around you who are seeking their happily ever after by marrying again, this is the column for you. Let’s explore the issues that come with remarriage, and more importantly, the solutions together.